The cheerful tones emitting from my phone at 4:30am are meant to install a firm but positive reminder to get out of bed for the day. At least that is what I think they are supposed to do.
Oh how I loathe them.
Grasping blindly into the dark, I snooze that little alarm and sink back into the comfort of my bed for just five more minutes. Snoozing only of course because I have to get up and play the part of a grown up person with responsibilities. Life was much easier before responsibilities….they’re terrible and I do not recommend them. Stay a kid as long as you can. Looking back I laugh at all of the things that seemed like such a big deal back then. Ugh, if those were my only problems now.
When those screeching tones…ahem….I mean dulcet tones sound again I drag myself from bed, stumble through the dark and begin my day. It is becoming methodical and I love that.
Get workout clothes on, grab water bottle, grab headphones, head downstairs and begin the morning workout.
Pushups: 5 sets of 10 each
Squats: 5 sets of 10 each
Jumping jacks: 5 sets of 10 each.
Plank for as long as I can (this equates to 45 seconds. Who the hell knew holding yourself up could be so exhausting?)
I have been doing this for a solid week now and nothing wakes me up better than this short work out. I’ve gone back to the basics. I’ve returned to the most simplistic ways to work out. My blood is now pumping, my favorite work out songs are now on repeat in my head, and I am ready to begin the rest of my day. I am back on Keto, so I head upstairs and grab the breakfast supplies. Two eggs are cracked into the pan. Scramble them up, add some cheese and pack it all up to eat when I get to work. I grab some cauliflower and almonds for a snack, turn on the coffee maker and hit the shower.
Letting the warm water wash over me, I inhale the steam and breathe deeply, steadily. Visualizing the things I want to accomplish for the day, the type of interactions I wish to have and good things for my family member I pray for the strength and drive to accomplish my tasks. This is me manifesting the good I want in my life. This is the only time I have found in my otherwise chaotic day to accomplish this task. This is my only true alone time. This is where I try to set a tone of drive and accomplishment. After this I get dressed and take my big lovable slobbery dog Abby outside to do her business and play for a moment. You know who is always happy and excited to see me? My dog. She does not care if I’m a mess or stressed or crabby. Petting her and running around with her before work always puts me in a better mood. I bring her in, plant kisses on the still slumbering faces of my husband and children, cuddle the cat, ready up the coffee maker for my husband and head out to whatever fresh hell or exciting adventures await me on my day.
These are habits I am actively trying to form. The world at this moment in time has been stressing me out for months now. No one truly knows what is going on with this pandemic. Mask or no mask? (Mask for me thank you very much) Send my kids to school in a few weeks or keep them home? Am I cleaning enough? Am I doing enough to keep my family safe? Is my father going to be ok? Are my kids happy and stimulated enough being cooped up at home? Is my husband ok? AM I ENOUGH? Do my friends know how much I still love them as I was so wrapped up in my anxiety and bad feelings that I dropped off the face of the planet for a long time? Am I being a good wife? A good mother? Did I remember to shut the garage this morning? These thoughts were seemingly endless and I could find now good way to turn off my brain.
My therapist is helping with my obvious anxiety. She is helping me to focus on the now, on what I can control, and on bettering myself through mindfulness, manifesting positivity and setting good routines for myself. I am so glad I finally decided to take that plunge and see someone. I felt like I was drowning alone in my own head and I needed guidance.
Positive Forward Progress.
This is what I am all about these days. This positive morning routine is a step in the right direction. Onward and upwards always my friends. Will I be able to keep this up and continue to create new positive habits?
I am damn well going to try.
What are you doing for yourself lately?